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[心情感悟] 那年的高三

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发表于 2014-4-24 11:01:30 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
青春,在不知所云的课堂里昏昏大睡,一不小心,高中大半时光狠狠丢下我,留下一个轻蔑的眼神头也不回的走了。

这里的我,面对成绩单上那串咒语般的数字,自己都开始看不起自己。

遇到任何事,我都用一成不变的“无所谓”应对,无所谓分数,无所谓名次,无所谓……其实我也不知道到底什么才是无所谓的。就像是误会,我也懒得去解释,这都已是习惯了。

我总是漫无目的的游荡,有时候,我真的不知道生命的意义是什么,难道我的存在就只是别人的负担?我不想这么下去,先别管未来是否会快乐,至少先别成为负担吧。

我在七岁的秋千上睡着了,醒来便十七了,中间的十年年少青春,昏昏而过,记忆摇摇晃晃。突然,想开始认真的对待生活,认真地对待学习,认真地对待我扮演的所有角色。可是面对“开始”时的手足无措只能让我再次颓废。

命运把所有都安排得顺理成章,把所有的都给得完全,唯独没有给下“重来”的字眼,只能绝望的观望,那碎着的一地冰凉,门外却是春暖花开,这种温度,拼不起温暖。

当雨下了太久,直到我快忘了什么春光灿烂。

今日久违的阳光,带来的是37度的温柔,无索取的快乐,无贪婪的享受。

桃花,或许是我心中春光里最撩人的一道倩影。我固执的认为春风之所以温柔是因为怕惊扰到了桃花的笑魇。这些一点一滴的美,都一个个有生命的鲜活的梦。只是,望着花瓣随风远去,会慕名的伤感。

漫长漫长的等待,换来短暂短暂绚烂,再随着一种温柔永恒的逝去——这就是美好。没来得及欣赏,都跑到了我身后,提醒我只是路人。

“人面不知何处去,桃花依旧笑春风”无来油的浮现在脑海,好像一切注定着——物是人非。

我把瞬间的起伏化成我的表达方式去收藏,因为那是生活泛起的涟漪。她说,永远不愿看到我眉目成伤,也希望有天我的字里行间别再那么沧桑。

笑着哭是不是幸福,我不知道,我却知道哭着笑是最痛。现实是伟大的,他可以让人把最初的浪漫忘记,不留痕迹却彻彻底底。

外面的世界,复杂、残忍、可怕,我这些不经世事的天经地义在满眼沧桑的世态炎凉面前,卑微到尘埃。害怕、爱逃避又输不起的我却要选择坚持,在这场青春的豪赌里,一不小心就会输光全部,不得不承认,我是纠结的。

生命的字典里,永远没有重来。看,花开多美,来年依旧吗?是的,来年会再开,却永远回不去经年那朵。花败,即是永别。

高中,清彻明媚。这些日子,我们一起疯,一起闹,一起为假期倒计时;我们在阳光下飞扬扈;我们在林荫里多愁善感;我们奋笔疾书,大写未来。这些平平淡淡,这些轰轰烈烈……那是我们的青春,我们最初的浪漫,最纯真的情感,最接近本真的梦想。因为有那些,青春不再显得那么单薄。

固执也好,清高也罢。毕竟,那是别人的看法,无我无关。活着,本就不容易,说白了,就是会很累,如果一一解释,那一定未老先衰。面对很多很多,或许别人口中的‘虚伪’也就是我们最华丽解释。

……

记录每一道风景,记录每一种人生,时过境迁,你是我,年少,轻狂的梦。
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沙发
发表于 2014-11-12 10:20:10 | 只看该作者
!!!!!!!!
地板
发表于 2014-12-30 12:07:57 | 只看该作者
可惜我读到高三开学就收拾包袱走人了!
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发表于 2015-4-17 05:14:56 | 只看该作者
提示: 作者被禁止或删除 内容自动屏蔽
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